Welcome to State Of The Union, appearing each month in bluegrass now magazine! This column provides the spouses of professional bluegrass musicians with a forum in which they can share their insights, observations, and experience with fans and other bluegrass spouses.

February 2004: Sherrie Graham on STAYING IN TOUCH

Sherrie Graham first became a fan of her husband's music when she was almost too little to buy his albums.

“When I was nine years old, I started listening to the Bluegrass Cardinals,” she remembers. “They're still my all-time favorite band.” She was so enamored of the band's music that she wrote out the lyrics to all their songs, transcriptions that her parents still have and talk about with amusement and pride.

Five years passed before Sherrie first saw her future husband perform live. By then, Randy was working with Doyle Lawson, appearing at the Festival of the Bluegrass. “I'll never forget it. There was a huge crowd. They were doing 'Sea of Life,' and they encored four or five times. It was one of those moments when you just get cold chills. The music was so moving.”

As the youngest daughter of a family that loves bluegrass music, Sherrie would hear Randy perform many times before they actually began dating in 1989. But she insists it wasn't love at first site.

“What he was, to me, was annoying,” she laughs. “He would just tease everybody all the time. He's still that way! Somebody asked me not too long ago, 'Now how in the world did he get you?!!' I said, 'He wouldn't leave me alone!'”

The Grahams do everything they can to stay in touch, and they aren't afraid to take advantage of emerging technologies. Sherrie and Randy both have cellular phones and are currently using Cingular's service. “That's what David uses, and he's had such good luck with it. We can e-mail with the phones if we need to-send text messaging and that type of thing. The band has something rigged up on the bus where they can all charge their phones at the same time!”

Chuckling a bit, Sherrie reports that their plan includes 5,000 minutes per month. “That's a lot! But Randy does a lot of business, booking shows and so forth, and he uses the cell for that. He calls at least once a day when he's out on the road.”

The couple also uses computers to stay in touch. “I have a home computer, and he uses a laptop,” Sherrie says. “We actually purchased the laptop so he could work on the Web site while he's out on the road, driving up and down the highway.” Randy's Dell Inspiron 4100 is a nifty machine that can easily handle the graphics and special effects he uses for the band's site at www.DavidParmleyandContinentalDivide.com. “His time has really been consumed with trying to get it built. It's the first site he's done; he's learning as he goes. We're trying to be patient with him!” Luckily, Randy's had some help from Dreama Stephenson, wife of musician Larry Stephenson and a Web designer herself.

Sherrie is grateful for the new high-tech methods of communication. “We're so used to them we don't even think about them anymore. If I need something, I just pick up the phone and call. I will say this: I try not to call too often, because I'm not always sure if the guys in the band are asleep or resting, and I don't like to disturb them. Normally I wait for Randy to call me. He's always been good about calling.” Often, Randy phones Sherrie and asks her to handle various administrative tasks for the band when he can't take care of them on the road. “If he needs to get contracts out, if he wants something e-mailed and doesn't have service, or if he needs phone interviews set up, I do those things for him. He tries to keep me involved.”

And she doesn't mind a bit, because it's all for the music. “I love the music!” she enthuses. “Frankly, that's what brought us together, and one of the things that's kept us together-our mutual love of bluegrass!”